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  • Writer's picturecocodensmore

I haven't cried once since I've been here.

December 15, 2023

It’s morning on the third day in my new apartment in Portland. I keep thinking how I need to write about how this feels. I compare how I feel now to how I felt with mom and the difference is so significant I’m not certain what to make of it.

I haven’t cried once since I’ve been here. I’ve not been overwhelmed by that sadness I cannot control, cannot stop. I’m sure I will cry again, even now just writing this, tears well up, and then abate. It’s so sad I was so sad for so very long. I’m not foolish enough to think I won’t be sad again just from this change of situation. But perhaps I’ll be less sad and sad less often.

Oh God, I sure hope so.

I Persevere. And life goes on.




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